One of the things I absolutely love about working from home and running my own business is that my kids see a strong work ethic in me.
On the flip side, one thing that I despise about working from home and running my own business is that my kids see me working. A LOT.
My work day doesn’t always end at 5:00 PM. Sometimes I am squeezing in things when I can because, let’s be honest, when you’re work is AT home…it never goes away.
I struggle with that because when I used to work at my corporate job, my work day ended at 4:30 PM and that was it. Done.
I didn’t think about work again until the next morning at 8:00 AM.
But, it seems like lately my to-do list has been unending and my ability to be able to “shut it off” has been lacking.
I was laying in bed last week and I thought to myself, “Man, I feel like I have been working a lot. On my phone a lot. Responding to emails and messages…A LOT.”
I prayed about it and I specifically asked God to help me get my priorities straight. I know work is important, but nothing is as important as spending time with my kids while they are this age.
I prayed something like this…
To be honest, I woke up the next morning and went about my day as usual. Working into the evening and squeezing in computer time when I should have been outside playing ball with the boys. I spent the ENTIRE weekend on my computer dealing with some website issues, planning a conference and editing pictures.
On Sunday, at the kitchen counter, my oldest son looked at me and we exchanged these words…
Him: Hey mom, you’re the best mom in the world!
Me: Awww, that’s sweet buddy. Thank you. You’re the best son in the world.
Him: There’s only one thing I don’t like about you.
Me: Oh yea, what’s that son?
Him: You never play with us.
Me: I do too! I play lots of things with you.
Him: Not really, you’re always working.
My heart sank into my stomach. Not because I thought I didn’t worked too much or play with him enough, but because…he was right.
Do I play with them? Of course I do.
Do I do it as often as I should? I think his answer said it best, I don’t.
He was speaking truth into me that, as hard as it was, I needed to hear. For some reason, that moment resonated with me and has been on my heart ever since.
I thought, is he going to grow up and tell his future wife, “Yea, I had a great mom, but she never played with us.”
I don’t want him to remember me as that kind of mom.
He’s only 7 and while I know that doesn’t seem very old, it’s a very impressionable age. One that he will likely recall when he’s grown.
I don’t want any of my kids to grow up and remember me as the mom who didn’t play with them.
I think it’s hard for me because they are boys. I never liked baseball or soccer or basketball or hiking or DIRT. Gawwwww, I hated dirt (still do).
I was a girly-girl. These boys are the opposite of everything I ever knew growing up. They want me to play Tonka Trucks, shoot hoops and throw them fly balls. Sometimes it’s hard for me to want to do that. And sometimes I don’t do it.
But I truly believe that God is showing me what my priorities NEED to be despite my, at times, selfish attitude. He used Parker to not only speak honestly to me, but to encourage me to change the way I am living.
To truly get my priorities back in balance and to focus on the things in this life that matter most.
It’s funny the way that God answers our prayers, isn’t it? It’s not always how I imagine, but He is always faithful.
I would highly suggest sitting down and asking yourself this question:
If the answer is yes, good job! God sees your heart and He rejoices that it’s already in the right place.
If the answer is no, good job! God still sees your heart and He knows that even though it might not be in the right place today, you are willing to work and get it to the right place tomorrow.