You’d never know from the looks of theses sweet faces that we’ve been having such a hard few weeks. And when I say hard, I mean some of the most difficult moments I’ve ever experienced as a parent.
I can honestly say that maybe I got a little cocky about this whole motherhood thing. I thought that I had it all figured out… and then some.
I was pretty judgmental at times when I saw other kids doing the “wrong” thing and I thought to myself…
“Geeeeez, can’t those parents get their kids under control.”
I would NEVER let me kid throw a tantrum in the middle of a restaurant like some of these mothers. Right?
We’ve all said it, haven’t we?
Until, yep, it’s your kid.
Throwing a tantrum in the middle of a restaurant. Or a grocery store. Or the church nursery.
Or the middle of a fair – where, for pete’s sake, there are rides and funnel cakes…how can they have ANY reason to be ticked off.
Suddenly you feel what EVERY parent that has a strong willed child has felt….
You try to politely ask them to calm down. And what happens next?
They get louder.
So you raise your voice and get stern…or as I like to call it – I get out my mean mom voice.
They get even louder. And now they’re not just screaming, but they’re trying to smack your legs.
So you do the whole, take them off to the side thing, where you think, Ah-Ha, I’ll show you that you can’t talk to me like that.
And you know what happens next? They keep going and going and by now? They are flailing around on the concrete like you just told them they could never eat popsicles again in their entire life.
Just as you reach for your husbands help, you realize, crap…he’s at home with your middle child.
And now your in the center of a carnival, standing next to the corn dog stand (which smells amazing by the way), with a kid that refuses to get off the ground unless you win him the overpriced stuffed animal at the fish bowl toss.
And you suck at putting any kind of ball in a small glass jar of water from 7 feet away so you know it would take you over $25 to win the dang 50 cent stuffed Spiderman. You feel like crying, but instead you laugh as the people who walk by stare and point.
Some even giggle.
Like, “Ohhhh look at her, that poor mom can’t get her child under control.”
Ok, tell me I’m not the only one. This has happened to you, yes? Maybe not this exact scenario, but something similar, right?
Take that scenario and magnify it times 10 and that has been our life for the last 3 straight week with our youngest son. Granted he’s three. I get it. Three is a hard hard age. Trust me, I’ve done TWICE already.
But nothing could prepare me for the spirited, stubborn little boy we call SJ.
I absolutely love the kind words a friend text me last week. She said, “You, my dear, are in the deep dark trenches. THE LIGHT WILL SHINE.”
Just hearing those words made me realize two things:
1. She’s right.
2. Why on earth am I trying to do this alone. Without the help of God.
After all, He knows above anyone else what is going to work and not work when it comes to my sweet baby boy.
Six nights ago my husband and I began praying over SJ each night. And honestly, I’ve been praying off and on throughout the day for wisdom and guidance on how to best handle him. Because I finally realized? I can’t do this alone.
Maybe this is just chance. Or some people might call it luck. But SJ’s attitude, behavior and trouble areas are already improving.
I call it God. He moves mountains. And I remember crying out to him in tears, “Please God, I’m begging you…you have to show up. I’m breaking!”
He’s showing up. In big ways.
THE LIGHT WILL SHINE.
I can already see it peeking through.
**I will post an update on the progress and how things are drastically improving soon.