It was the night before my husband had a big project due for work. Yes, he loves to do things last minute. I already envisioned that Tuesday night he would be glued to the computer tying up loose ends to meet the deadline.

What I didn’t expect?

That he would walk in to the living room, sit next to me on the couch, and say…

“Babe, what would you like to see me do more of as your spiritual leader?”

It caught me off guard, to say the least. I truly thought he was sitting down next to me to start talking shop {blog shop}. Or to ask me to come up with something funny that he could tweet {yes, he consoles me for funny tweets occasionally}.

Or possibly to grope me in some I-know-I-don’t-have-time-tonight-but-I-still-want-to-try-and-make-out-with-you-and-grab-your-booty-on-the-couch kind of way.

But, nope. He sat down next to me to talk about “Godly” things??? On the night before his big work project was due?

Whoa. I was impressed.

{Can he get a round of applause please?}

But, my response? A blank stare.

Nothing particular came to mind when he asked me that question. And then I thought to myself,

“Wow, have I really NEVER thought about what I would like to see my husband do as a spiritual leader of our family?”

I guess I hadn’t. I mean, up until this night, I thought everything he was already doing seemed sufficient.

But, when a man is offering more {of anything} you should definitely take him up on it. Unless he’s offering you more dirty laundry. If that’s the case…say no.

More diamonds, yes. More cuddles, yes. More diaper changing duty, yes. So…more spiritual leadership should be no different.

I set out on a mission to give him my answer…

1. Consistently Lead Us In “Family Prayer Time”

We are pretty hit and miss when it comes to family prayer time. It’s on our calendar to do it every Monday evening at 8:00 pm. I would say we end up following through about 1 out of 5 times.

I am still terrified to pray out loud. Like it scares the be-Jesus out of me. Literally. I will absolutely NEVER be the one to suggest family prayer time because I am too afraid someone {a kid} may ask me to pray and it might send me in to a full on panic attack…sweaty pits and all.

I need led in this.

2. Strive To Have A Gentle Tone In His Words

There are times when I want to drag my kids by their shirt collars {on the rare occasion they may be wearing a shirt}, put them in my front yard, and put a sign next to them that says “FREE”. It might not sound “Godly” or “Pretty”, but it’s true.

They challenge me. But, I love them. And in all reality…if someone were to even think about stopping by to pick up one of my free treasures I would go all mama-bear on them. Kung-fu style.

I know, as a father, it’s easy to get frustrated when your kids are misbehaving. It’s easy to raise your voice {because, let’s face it, kids respond to dad’s deep tone}. But, I don’t want our kids to be “scared” in to behaving. I want them to respect. I want them to be shown grace and mercy.

No, I am not saying I want them to walk all over us. What I am saying? Children hang on to every word that you speak to them. It’s important to not overreact or get out of line. I lack in this area. I am constantly raising my voice or yelling at one of them. And when my voice raising doesn’t work…I turn straight to my husband for back up.

“Gentle tone” is not in my vocabulary at times.

I need led in this.

3. The Courage To Be Bold

I didn’t grow up studying the Bible or attending church every Sunday. In fact, I have YET to read the Bible from front to back. Sometimes I feel disqualified from being able to talk about my faith because I feel uneducated. Or not smart enough.

When I see my husband talk about God with confidence, it rubs off on me. I love his boldness, but I find myself hiding when Christian conversations come about. What if someone asks me, “Oh, remember the part in the Bible where John says….” Will I just nod and pretend I know that part? You know, the part I have never read.

I need the courage to be bold. I need more faith. The best way for me to be led? By example.

While my husband doesn’t realize this…when I see him raise his hands during worship…I instantly feel comfort. I feel more confident. I feel less worried about what people were thinking of me the 5 minutes prior while I was raising my hands.

His boldness is contagious. I need more boldness.

I need led in this.

{And clearly I need the encouragement to be in my Bible more.}

If we aren’t the ones influencing our children…someone will be. I don’t want to take that chance.

With P starting Kindergarten it’s even more important now. He will be surrounded by all different kinds of people. I want to make sure that he grows up knowing that Jesus is the center of his life. Not football. Or Baseball. Or his girlfriend.

Jesus.

I want all of my kids to understand that. The responsibility is on “us’ as parents to teach them and I need to be held accountable for that.

The best part of me wanting to “be led” is that I have someone who is willing to lead me. For that, I am blessed.

What about you? What things do you desire from your husband as the spiritual leader of your home?

Deuteronomy 6:6-7 – And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.